I Have Small Boobs — No, My Boyfriend Is Not a Pedophile.
I believe most people who are somewhat interested in fashion and beauty are aware that being thin is making a comeback, but of course it never really went out of style. And if you've noticed the trend, you've probably also noticed the flood of content reacting to it, most of it worried. I've watched my share of videos warning that "thinspo" and "heroin chic" are back, and we've even coined a name for the latest version of the look: the "Ozempic face".
This post today is not about making a similar observation. Rather it is about acknowledging that there is content out there that, while it is supposed to serve as a tool against unachievable female beauty standards and 'the male gaze', in reality perpetuates them because it highlights precisely what it tries to reject.
I saw a video titled approximately as follows: "Female beauty standards that are rooted in pedophilia". It listed off some specific qualities that I myself would agree stem from the perspective that for women to be beautiful, or perhaps better said desirable, they should portray the image of youth. Women are more desirable when they are naive, hairless, small, petite - childlike. While I would tend to agree that some of these features are narrowly associated with a 'childlike' being, what this video however also mentioned was having a lack of curves.
As a woman with a smaller than average chest (#ittybittytittycommittee), I have been made aware of this my entire life. I have been called flat, a pancake, or a board. And while not all of the comments were with malicious intent, they were always frivolous and comedic. Normality is sacred, abnormality disdained. And perceiving my abnormality, I internalised what all the comments seemed to allude to: a real woman is supposed to have breasts.
So when this video appeared, it echoed what all the comments from before had told me. What it is trying to say is: don't curate your appearance around harmful beauty standards. Instead it tells me that if someone is interested in me, the only truly sensible explanation for this is that that person must be a pedophile. Diversity of beauty is preached, yet when diverse beauty is appreciated we rationalise and justify it.
I have small boobs,
I am not a child,
I am a woman,
and my boyfriend is definitely not a pedophile.